Saturday, August 23, 2008

The Last Week of Summer

One week from today is Labor Day weekend. Really? Where the heck did my summer go? I've worked so much this summer that I don't even feel like I had any time off. I know I went to PA for 5 days, but still - that was months ago. Maybe I'll feel like I've had a vacation when I get back to school.

Ahh, school. This is my LAST semester. Bittersweet, since I SHOULD have been done in May except for a nasty run-in with melted snow and a nasty professor... casts and clinicals just don't mix. I've worked three 12-hour shifts a week, taken a class online, and also done a 135-hour internship class at the same hospital I've worked. I feel like I'm ALWAYS at the hospital! But, in just 3-1/2 short months, I'll have my BSN and a minor in Healthcare Administration.

My husband and I talked last night and I said how bummed I am - the best GPA I can get is 3.48. Just .02 short of Cum Laude. Hubby, who meant well, said that it's a better GPA than "most people like you" could get. "Most people?" I asked with a hint of anger in my voice. "Yeah. You know, people who are full-time students, full-time moms, volunteer way to much at the kids' school and generally have a life other than school. Somebody who's not 22 years old and all they have to do at night is study." Hmm - he redeemed himself with that one.

So how come that .02 sticks in my craw? Why is it that I'd be thrilled for any of my friends to achieve that grade but I'm annoyed with myself? Because I know all the times I didn't give 100% (because I'd given so much of myself elsewhere that I couldn't) and my grades reflected that. Because I didn't try as hard with my business classes as I do with my nursing classes because they're "not as important?" Yeah, all that and more.

Sometimes I've just got to learn to let it go and look at the big picture - I'll be a REAL nurse. I'll have a great job to support my family. I'll have more time at home. We're going to Hawaii. We're not losing our house and no one I love has died recently. Get over yourself! But still, .02...

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